I'm going to be lazy this year and treat you to last year's Christmas poem, which I don't think I ever published here. The sweat and blood (and copious amounts of Chardonnay) I put into all that rhyming warrants a bit more exposure than just friends and family.
I have a collection of "Only in Africa" pictures I've collected over the years. I've uploaded some of these to my Facebook page as "Humor of the Day" shots, but now thought I might put them together in a collection. I can't give credit to the photographers in this case - most of these were sent to me via long email chains that make tracking down the photographer impossible .
"The Problem with you, Mom, is that you always have to have the last word." Excuse me? A teenager was accusing ME of having the last word, when there isn't a teenager in this family, or possibly the entire world, who doesn't ALWAYS have the last word? I was sitting at the dinner table, stunned at my recent and utter defeat at the hands of my four glowering children.
A reader, an American currently living in South Africa, reported buying a newspaper and her change being pulled out of a "Joburg bra," as she phrased it. Another reader had spent long expat years in Mali and confessed to always keeping money in her bra. It was part of the cultural training and she still finds it a very practical storage location to put her cash.
You Know You've Been Away from Germany for Too Long When... You are alarmed when your car turns itself off at every red light; You wonder what to do with the gigantic hotel room key. It's an actual key! With a huge weight on it! You can't manage to squeeze your car into the tiny parking space. You have no clue whether it's called Der, Die, or Das iPad; and more!
Not much in today's world is more universally reviled or at least complained about. Almost everyone who has one usually agrees that they are a pain. It's the one topic Bashar al-Assad and President Obama would likely find much in common about. Even though Assad doesn't quite have one yet. I'm talking about teenagers of course.
When you move to Africa, you soon learn to say "This is Africa" when things are moving at a glacial pace, or not at all. And yet, it is also endearing. But in my eagerness to record all the hilarious TIA moments in Africa, I had forgotten about all the weird stuff that can happen to you right here at home in the United States. A condition that we have dubbed "Only in America."
I’ve just discovered a gem that brought tears of laughter (and a few of regret) to my eyes.
If you want to understand South Africa and its various racial groups and be thoroughly entertained in the process, the absolute best way is to watch White Wedding. You can get it on Amazon (see ...
YOU ARE PROUDLY SOUTH AFRICAN WHEN…
# You call a bathing suit a a “kossie”.
# You call a traffic light a “robot”.
# You call an elevator a “lift”
# You call a car hood a “bonnet”
# You call a car trunk a “boot”
In our South African house, I was puzzled to find no door bell.
In our American house, I am puzzled to find no toilet roll holder.
In our South African house, all the towel bars were loose and rattled.
In our American house, there are no towel bars.
In our South African ...